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DON’T TOUCH ANYTHING!!

DON’T TOUCH ANYTHING!

I can’t tell what a week it has been.

It was incredible.

But, not in a good way.

I just got out of the hospital for a severe gastrointestinal bacteria infection.

Not the flu.

I repeat BACTERIAL.

Like little bugs, one gets in and they multiply at such a rapid rate, and your body is trying to expel it– too scary.

It was so severe, and unrelenting, that literally there was a moment when I thought it was gonna be like the Muppets man, Jim Henson. He had a gastrointestinal infection, and if he would have just gone into the hospital for antibiotics he would never died.

So, as my natural exfiltration of both ends is me was going on for hours and hours and hours, it seemed like the only thing to do was to go to the ER.

I have never been so sick in my entire life.

And, as I lied on the hospital bed, I was so grateful for technology and antibiotics. I thought to myself–

What do people do before antibiotics?

PEOPLE DIED!

That sucks, man.

Seriously sucks.

I was advised by the doctors, however, that this was something that I must’ve picked up in a PUBLIC AREA.

Meaning…

Holding onto a grocery cart…

Touching a bathroom door…

Pressing an elevator button… You name it.

YIKES!

I always thought that if I didn’t use all of antibacterial soaps, and just used regular soap, that it would build my immunity system to fight off just regular types of bacteria.

However… This was not a regular type of bacteria.

It’s called or fecal oral rabid transmission.

Let me repeat that… (If you can stomach it, literally!)

It’s called FECAL ORAL RABID TRANSMISSION.

Yuck.

SUPER YUCK!

So as I was laying in the hospital bed, after they admitted me from ER, I was rethinking my life and how I might change some of my day-to-day processes.

That is totally F-ed!

Just because somebody out in the public, I can’t seem to keep their hands and body clean, and spread their sickly germs all over the place — I had to face God.

And trust me, I did.

So near to tell you, when you see those people wearing gloves out in public and those little facemasks, I don’t think it’s going to be me. But I totally understand now, why they wear those things.

Because getting seriously ill is scary.

I don’t want my life to change too much, just because I had this extreme infection.

I don’t want to be a prisoner, trying to keep myself away from germs.

But honestly,

I’m gonna think twice about where I touch. If my elbow can hit the elevator button, that’s what my elbow’s going to do.

No biggie. Just enough to keep me well.

So after those two glorious days in the hospital, plus all the hours that I spent in ER, let this be a lesson to all of us:

– to wash our hands

– to be careful where we touch

– don’t touch your face eyes and nose more than you need to. Those are main spots where germs get in

– don’t use my makeup at the makeup counters, you don’t know who’s been there before

Plus, this is a horrible flu season… All these things may keep us healthier.

I’m still on antibiotics, and I am TRULY GRATEFUL FOR THEM.

Stay well, my friends!

Love is out there, but so are seriously freaky germs.

xoxo

Belle

Red Hot Love    Or... Radar Love? Which is it?

Red Hot Love Or… Radar Love? Which is it?

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Multi Award-Winning Author Get your copy today!

Available for ALL DIGITAL READERS!

—–

Digital Edition only $0.99

Writer’s Digest Awarded “E.B. White and Me.” Get your copy today!

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Available at Amazon!

E.B. White and Me
E.B. White and Me
BUY IT TODAY!

xoxo

Belle

www.BelleKarper.com

Beverly Hills Film Festival - Official Selection FinalistBeverly Hills Film Festival – Official Selection Finalist

2012 Winnner Best Dramedy — “Belayed”, 2010 Finalist and 1st Runner Up — “Pickled Tink”

las vegas film festival logo

Official Finalist Las Vegas Film Festival

Belle Karper - Las Vegas Film Festival

Belle Karper – 2012 Official Finalist Las Vegas Film Festival

Writer's Digest Awarded AurthorAwarded Author

Fade In Awards

Fade In Awards Quarter-Finalist – still in the running!

FIRST PLACE WINNER – MOFILM Los Angeles, Next SXSW competition in Austin, then Barcelona, Spain!

Writer's Digest Award Winner - S. Belle Karper A 78th Annual Writer’s Digest Award Winning Author

Finalist 2011 Top 25 Semi-Finalist Los Angeles Comedy Festival

Finalist 2011 10th FilmMakers International Screenwriting Awards (1st Round Qualifier — Still in Running)

Finalist 2011 New York City Gotham Film Festival – Final 5th Place Comedy

Top 24 Finalist Los Angeles Reel Film Festival 2011

Contest Top 20 Finalist Atlanta PeachTree Film Festival 2011

Top 24 Finalist SkyFest Film Festival 2011

— Announcing “PICKLED TINK” — Screwball Comedy Screenplay! Belle Karper,

— Announcing “MAKING UP WITH MORTELLA” — Dark Comedy about Good and Evil, the magic of MakeUp and the Beauty of the Heart.

Award-Winning Author, Screenwriter, Speaker, Humor, Comedy, Suspense, Tragedy www.BelleKarper.com Email Belle@BelleKarper.com WHY THE WIDOW WEARS BLACK - An Edgy Memoir from an Outspoken Survivor Check out Belle Karper’s – Beauties and Beasts – Blog! Baby! Blog! and Belle Karper Face Book & the popular Twitter-Belle - The Ridiculous Escapades of Belle Karper on YouTube!

All on Website Save it, Baby! Count me in! Add to Technorati Favorites BelleKarper-AuthorSpeaker7.jpg picture by bellekarper

Partied Last Night, Y’all…!

Partied with some old

(well, not so old,

just long-standing,

well some of them are old,

some of them are old-er,

and actually some of them are short,

but nothing is wrong with short,

and some of them are tall,

but I love them all).

Yes... and then there were more!

Yes... and then there were more!

To make a long story short (too late)

We had a good time.

SWEET!

;-)

Belle

www.BelleKarper.com

—–

Now… go feed my fish!

They are freaking hungry, man!

—–

Digital Edition only $0.99

Red Hot Love    Or... Radar Love? Which is it?

Red Hot Love Or… Radar Love? Which is it?

Digital Edition only $0.99

Multi Award-Winning Author Get your copy today!

Available for ALL DIGITAL READERS!

—–

Digital Edition only $0.99

Writer’s Digest Awarded “E.B. White and Me.” Get your copy today!

Available for ALL DIGITAL READERS!

Available at Amazon!

E.B. White and Me
E.B. White and Me
BUY IT TODAY!

xoxo

Belle

www.BelleKarper.com

Beverly Hills Film Festival - Official Selection FinalistBeverly Hills Film Festival – Official Selection Finalist

Writer's Digest Awarded AurthorAwarded Author

Fade In Awards

Fade In Awards Quarter-Finalist – still in the running!

FIRST PLACE WINNER – MOFILM Los Angeles, Next SXSW competition in Austin, then Barcelona, Spain!

Writer's Digest Award Winner - S. Belle Karper A 78th Annual Writer’s Digest Award Winning Author

Finalist 2011 Top 25 Semi-Finalist Los Angeles Comedy Festival

Finalist 2011 10th FilmMakers International Screenwriting Awards (1st Round Qualifier — Still in Running)

Finalist 2011 New York City Gotham Film Festival – Final 5th Place Comedy

Finalist and 1st Runner Up Screenwriting Comp

Top 24 Finalist Los Angeles Reel Film Festival 2011

Contest Top 20 Finalist Atlanta PeachTree Film Festival 2011

Top 24 Finalist SkyFest Film Festival 2011

— Announcing  “PICKLED TINK” — Screwball Comedy Screenplay!   Belle Karper,

— Announcing  “MAKING UP WITH MORTELLA” — Dark Comedy about Good and Evil, the magic of MakeUp and the Beauty of the Heart.

Award-Winning Author, Screenwriter, Speaker, Humor, Comedy, Suspense, Tragedy www.BelleKarper.com                         Email Belle@BelleKarper.com WHY THE WIDOW WEARS BLACK - An Edgy Memoir from an Outspoken Survivor Check out Belle Karper’s – Beauties and Beasts – Blog! Baby! Blog! and Belle Karper Face Book & the popular Twitter-Belle - The Ridiculous Escapades of Belle Karper on YouTube!

All on Website Save it, Baby! Count me in! Add to Technorati Favorites BelleKarper-AuthorSpeaker7.jpg picture by bellekarper

Dick Clark… Dies at 82.

It’s amazing to think that Dick Clark  actually died.

The ageless, flawless man.

Who could have thought that he was actually mortal?

Dick Clark... ever ageless

Dick Clark... ever ageless

He started at American Bandstand.

American Bandstand.

You can google that show if you need to, or just click here: American Bandstand

What an incredible journey his life has had.

So many people learnerd how to dance because of that show.

They learned how to rock ‘n roll.

But, The most miraculous thing about Dick Clark… was that he never aged.

Hmmm…

What a thought.

I could buy into that.

I could be digging that.

Oh, yeah.

So, that ageless thing has done him well…

And the fact that he wasa brilliant guy in front of the behind the cameras.

Not too shabby.

$100 Million at 82, means you’re doing something right.

I heard he was a great guy.

I just need to know the name of his plastic surgeon… or at least his make-up lady.

;-)

Rest in Peace.

Another legend now in the outfield…

xoxo

Belle

www.BelleKarper.com

—–

Now… go feed my fish!

They are freaking hungry, man!

—–

Digital Edition only $0.99

Red Hot Love    Or... Radar Love? Which is it?

Red Hot Love Or… Radar Love? Which is it?

Digital Edition only $0.99

Multi Award-Winning Author Get your copy today!

Available for ALL DIGITAL READERS!

—–

Digital Edition only $0.99

Writer’s Digest Awarded “E.B. White and Me.” Get your copy today!

Available for ALL DIGITAL READERS!

Available at Amazon!

E.B. White and Me
E.B. White and Me
BUY IT TODAY!

xoxo

Belle

www.BelleKarper.com

Beverly Hills Film Festival - Official Selection FinalistBeverly Hills Film Festival – Official Selection Finalist

Writer's Digest Awarded AurthorAwarded Author

Fade In Awards

Fade In Awards Quarter-Finalist – still in the running!

FIRST PLACE WINNER – MOFILM Los Angeles, Next SXSW competition in Austin, then Barcelona, Spain!

Writer's Digest Award Winner - S. Belle Karper A 78th Annual Writer’s Digest Award Winning Author

Finalist 2011 Top 25 Semi-Finalist Los Angeles Comedy Festival

Finalist 2011 10th FilmMakers International Screenwriting Awards (1st Round Qualifier — Still in Running)

Finalist 2011 New York City Gotham Film Festival – Final 5th Place Comedy

Finalist and 1st Runner Up Screenwriting Comp

Top 24 Finalist Los Angeles Reel Film Festival 2011

Contest Top 20 Finalist Atlanta PeachTree Film Festival 2011

Top 24 Finalist SkyFest Film Festival 2011

— Announcing  “PICKLED TINK” — Screwball Comedy Screenplay!   Belle Karper,

— Announcing  “MAKING UP WITH MORTELLA” — Dark Comedy about Good and Evil, the magic of MakeUp and the Beauty of the Heart.

Award-Winning Author, Screenwriter, Speaker, Humor, Comedy, Suspense, Tragedy www.BelleKarper.com                         Email Belle@BelleKarper.com WHY THE WIDOW WEARS BLACK - An Edgy Memoir from an Outspoken Survivor Check out Belle Karper’s – Beauties and Beasts – Blog! Baby! Blog! and Belle Karper Face Book & the popular Twitter-Belle - The Ridiculous Escapades of Belle Karper on YouTube!

All on Website Save it, Baby! Count me in! Add to Technorati Favorites BelleKarper-AuthorSpeaker7.jpg picture by bellekarper

My Micro-Short Video Finalist in over 2000 entries!

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(Save it, Baby! Count me in!)

So, it goes like this . . .

My Micro-Short for B&H Video got 37th Finalist position out of over 2000 entries!!

Watch it, Y’all!

xoxo

Belle

—–

Digital Edition only $0.99

Writer’s Digest Awarded “E.B. White and Me.” Get your copy today!

Available for ALL DIGITAL READERS!

Available at Amazon!

E.B. White and Me

E.B. White and Me

BUY IT TODAY!

xoxo

Belle

www.BelleKarper.com

FIRST PLACE WINNER – MOFILM Los Angeles, Next SXSW competition in Austin, then Barcelona, Spain!

Writer's Digest Award Winner - S. Belle Karper A 78th Annual Writer’s Digest Award Winning Author

Finalist 2011 Top 25 Semi-Finalist Los Angeles Comedy Festival

Finalist 2011 10th FilmMakers International Screenwriting Awards (1st Round Qualifier — Still in Running)

Finalist 2011 New York City Gotham Film Festival – Final 5th Place Comedy

Finalist and 1st Runner Up Screenwriting Comp

Top 24 Finalist Los Angeles Reel Film Festival 2011

Contest Top 20 Finalist Atlanta PeachTree Film Festival 2011

Top 24 Finalist SkyFest Film Festival 2011

— Announcing  “PICKLED TINK” — Screwball Comedy Screenplay!   Belle Karper,

— Announcing  “MAKING UP WITH MORTELLA” — Dark Comedy about Good and Evil, the magic of MakeUp and the Beauty of the Heart.

Award-Winning Author, Screenwriter, Speaker, Humor, Comedy, Suspense, Tragedy www.BelleKarper.com                         Email Belle@BelleKarper.com WHY THE WIDOW WEARS BLACK - An Edgy Memoir from an Outspoken Survivor Check out Belle Karper’s – Beauties and Beasts – Blog! Baby! Blog! and Belle Karper Face Book & the popular Twitter-Belle - The Ridiculous Escapades of Belle Karper on YouTube!

All on Website Save it, Baby! Count me in! Add to Technorati Favorites BelleKarper-AuthorSpeaker7.jpg picture by bellekarper

And, of course, watch my Skydiving Video.

Mountain Biking Malibu Backbone Trail (Pics)

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So, it goes like this . . .

Can you freaking believe it’s 86 degrees in January?

Hmmm… sorry East Coasters… and well, most anywhere but here.

So we have to get out an crunch some rocks, man!

Check out these pics… Awesome, Jack!

Wow! What at view! That glare is the Ocean, yeah!

Wow! What at view! That glare is the Ocean, yeah!

So we are riding up and down…

Yeah, that's me in the front...

Yeah, that's me in the front...

Still in front!

Still in front!

You can't catch me, I'm the Gingerbread man! (Way in front... the dot!)

You can't catch me, I'm the Gingerbread man! (Way in front... the dot!)

Oh yeah... Nice A$$! I mean, nice view!

Oh yeah... Nice A$$! I mean, nice view!

Only the best... Knolly.

Only the best... Knolly.

Take this view to the bank, man!

Take this view to the bank, man!

So get out and ride a bike, dude.

Super great.

Yeah!

xoxo

Belle

—–
Watch my Micro-Short for B&H Video:

—–

Digital Edition only $0.99

Writer’s Digest Awarded “E.B. White and Me.” Get your copy today!

Available for ALL DIGITAL READERS!

Available at Amazon!

E.B. White and Me

E.B. White and Me

BUY IT TODAY!

xoxo

Belle

www.BelleKarper.com

FIRST PLACE WINNER – MOFILM Los Angeles, Next SXSW competition in Austin, then Barcelona, Spain!

Writer's Digest Award Winner - S. Belle Karper A 78th Annual Writer’s Digest Award Winning Author

Finalist 2011 Top 25 Semi-Finalist Los Angeles Comedy Festival

Finalist 2011 10th FilmMakers International Screenwriting Awards (1st Round Qualifier — Still in Running)

Finalist 2011 New York City Gotham Film Festival – Final 5th Place Comedy

Finalist and 1st Runner Up Screenwriting Comp

Top 24 Finalist Los Angeles Reel Film Festival 2011

Contest Top 20 Finalist Atlanta PeachTree Film Festival 2011

Top 24 Finalist SkyFest Film Festival 2011

— Announcing  “PICKLED TINK” — Screwball Comedy Screenplay!   Belle Karper,

— Announcing  “MAKING UP WITH MORTELLA” — Dark Comedy about Good and Evil, the magic of MakeUp and the Beauty of the Heart.

Award-Winning Author, Screenwriter, Speaker, Humor, Comedy, Suspense, Tragedy www.BelleKarper.com                         Email Belle@BelleKarper.com WHY THE WIDOW WEARS BLACK - An Edgy Memoir from an Outspoken Survivor Check out Belle Karper’s – Beauties and Beasts – Blog! Baby! Blog! and Belle Karper Face Book & the popular Twitter-Belle - The Ridiculous Escapades of Belle Karper on YouTube!

All on Website Save it, Baby! Count me in! Add to Technorati Favorites BelleKarper-AuthorSpeaker7.jpg picture by bellekarper

And, of course, watch my Skydiving Video.

Annual Silver Bash… Naughty Rules! (Pics)

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So, it goes like this . . .

This is the season, right?

Right.

To tie one on…

Get a little wacky.

Pre-Alcohol, yo.

Pre-Alcohol, yo.

Well… you have to start somehwere…

Then we go to the party…

Of course we argued about the directions to get there.

We ARE married. Gosh.

Say Hello to the Hostess... Hello Lisa. Where's the bar?

Say Hello to the Hostess... Hello Lisa. Where's the bar?

So we make the necessary rounds…

Hell-o-o! A girl's gotta eat.

Hell-o-o! A girl's gotta eat.

Drinks and food in hand…

Well, needless to say, we didn’t talk to anyone for about eight minutes…

I had to pound down these delicioso edibles, Jack!

… … …  ;-)

Now it’s time to mingle and get cozy…

Hello mingles and cozies!

Hello mingles and cozies!

Gotta say hello to some buds…

Hey Buds!

Hey Buds!

Hey more Buds!

Hey more Buds!

Too many freaking Buds... where is the bar again?

Too many freaking Buds... where is the bar again?

Answer Me!

Where’s the bar again?!

Do they keep moving the bar?

Okay now, drink in hand, time to mingle.

A beautiful Animation Director/Producer

A beautiful Animation Director/Producer

Grab a dessert, I mean my husband!

Well he’s yummy, you know.

Met the director of Mulan 2.

Met the director of Mulan 2.

He’s a fiesty, fun man. We kept jumping into other people’s pictures together.

He is better at it than me.

Man, his neck is FAST.

The night grew older, and just before the Gift Exchange/Steal/Knock-Down-Drag-Out began…

My besties had to get a fun picture!

And, No... you CAN'T see my Woo-Woo!

And, No... you CAN'T see my Woo-Woo!

But great legs, huh?

The rest out of that was undocumentable… (is that a word?!)

Happy Holidays All!

Enjoy and Drive Safely.

Xoxo

Belle

—–

Digital Edition only $0.99

Writer’s Digest Awarded “E.B. White and Me.” Get your copy today!

Available for ALL DIGITAL READERS!

Available at Amazon!

E.B. White and Me

E.B. White and Me

BUY IT TODAY!

xoxo

Belle

www.BelleKarper.com

FIRST PLACE WINNER – MOFILM Los Angeles, Next SXSW competition in Austin, then Barcelona, Spain!

Writer's Digest Award Winner - S. Belle Karper A 78th Annual Writer’s Digest Award Winning Author

Finalist 2011 Top 25 Semi-Finalist Los Angeles Comedy Festival

Finalist 2011 10th FilmMakers International Screenwriting Awards (1st Round Qualifier — Still in Running)

Finalist 2011 New York City Gotham Film Festival – Final 5th Place Comedy

Finalist and 1st Runner Up Screenwriting Comp

Top 24 Finalist Los Angeles Reel Film Festival 2011

Contest Top 20 Finalist Atlanta PeachTree Film Festival 2011

Top 24 Finalist SkyFest Film Festival 2011

— Announcing  “PICKLED TINK” — Screwball Comedy Screenplay!   Belle Karper,

— Announcing  “MAKING UP WITH MORTELLA” — Dark Comedy about Good and Evil, the magic of MakeUp and the Beauty of the Heart.

Award-Winning Author, Screenwriter, Speaker, Humor, Comedy, Suspense, Tragedy www.BelleKarper.com                         Email Belle@BelleKarper.com WHY THE WIDOW WEARS BLACK - An Edgy Memoir from an Outspoken Survivor Check out Belle Karper’s – Beauties and Beasts – Blog! Baby! Blog! and Belle Karper Face Book & the popular Twitter-Belle - The Ridiculous Escapades of Belle Karper on YouTube!

All on Website Save it, Baby! Count me in! Add to Technorati Favorites BelleKarper-AuthorSpeaker7.jpg picture by bellekarper

And, of course, watch my Skydiving Video.

About my husband…

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So, it goes like this . . .

I need to tell you about my husband…

Here I am, ready to party, right?

Here I am, ready to party, right?

There I was, dressed to the nines, on my way to the IWOSC Holiday Gala.

Sitting in a brand-new car that I just bought, which will remain nameless.

I’m driving down the road, away from my house to meet up my with “group of the night” wackos, with whom I intend to tip several martinis and cause a general disturbance.

My friends and I made plans to all drive into the city in a car together so that we could talk and laugh… With one poor sap, I mean designated driver to be left out in the uninebriated cold.  ;-)

Not me! Yay!

So there I am, driving down the street, when I hear this horrible scraping sound near the bottom of my car.

I look around at the other cars and I’m thinking, “Who’s piece of crap is making that noise?”

I drive forward, but this sound seems to follow me.

I stare at the blue car next to me with a sort of frowny face – you know, that “Get that piece of crap away from me, you’re making me look bad” kind of face.

You know, a normal “girl” face.

Yeah. That face.

:-/

What do you expect?

I’m dressed up.

I’m going to a gala.

Stop freaking stop stalking me with your nasty-crappy broken car!

Jeez!

The blue car pulls away, and then I inch forward… only to hear that scrapy-rumply sound carry along with me.

WTF?

So I pull into the left lane, waiting for the red light, trying to figure out what the heck was going on.

I open my driver side door, and there it is…

A flat tire.

A flatter than flat tire, of the likes I have never seen.

Flatter than my grandma’s German pancakes!

Flatter than my first training bra!

Flatter than Nicki Minaj’s note that she holds in that one song– EEEEEEeeeeeeEEEEEEeeEee…

Now, that’s flat!

Holy F— sh–… well, let’s just say that my mouth wasn’t as pretty as my dress was.

Have to cross three lanes of traffic turning left, going about a foot per second…

That is slooooooooow, maaaaaaaaaan.

You can imagine how popular I was to the oncoming traffic.

I had so many middle fingers pointing at me, it probably comprised a whole hand… Maybe two… Maybe three.

Who’s counting?

Hey! I’ve got middle fingers of my own, you know.

However, I was so beautifully dressed, my hair so beautifully coiffed, and my my make-up so beautifully spread, that I was not about to tarnish all that darn beauty with a bunch of foul F-ing language…

So I am glad to tell you that I appraised the situation with inward “F. U’s.”

Inward.

You would have been proud of me.

I then had to pull into a parking lot at that horrifying-lightning-slow speed. I was as popular with the people now behind me as with the people I had just passed.

“Screw you!” I am thinking… Inwardly.

Ever inward.

This inward stuff sucks!

I finally found a parking space. One of those “small” ones. A freaking “compact” spot.

But hey, it’s all I got. I guess I can have to suffer the fact that someone will whack the sides my brand-new car door.

That almost irritates me as much as the flat tire.

So yes, yes! I AM LATE NOW.

I hate to be late.

And, now… I have to make the call of shame…

Crap, I hate that call of shame…

“Hey, I–”

“We’re on our way.”

“I got a flat tire. (Ugh.) Can you pick me up?” I ask my friends.

So we go through the verbal-telephone-dance of improper directions, until I am finally able to let them know (with some sort of minimal success) where I am deflated.

Now, the worst part.

I have to call my husband.

I hate being rescued.

I am a woman, God dammit!

I should be able to handle these things myself!

I should be able to call AAA, and have this flat tire… this tire that has ruined my day… and interrupted my night… fixed.

Right?

But heck… I’m all dressed up.

I have a party to go to.

I’ve got three martinis at least with my name on them.

And, those are big-assed martinis…

Call of shame #2…

“Hi hon–”

“Have fun tonight!” he says so sweetly.

I cringe.

Crap.

“I’ve got a flat tire.”

“Aaaah. I’m sorry. Just call AAA.”

“I can’t! I’m already late for the party!”

“But you’ve got a flat… you have to fix it.”

Ummmm.

And, this is where I will have to ask a question.

A difficult question, yes.

A painful question, especially for a woman such as I, considering my strength and resolve, the things I have gone through… yes, this next question will be particularly hard.

And then, after that question, there will be a sentence.

A breath, and then an utterance, and then a sentence.

A sentence that will determine what kind of man I married.

This next sentence, will tell me… if he is “hero” material…

Do I really want to have this confirmed… or denied?

Do I really want to know the answer to this question so early in our married life?

We are still on our honeymoon phase, for God’s sake.

Am I ready to find out… if he can be… a hero… for me?

I look at my watch.

I pretend it has a secondhand, so that I can imagine the seconds that are ticking by.

He persists, “You have your AAA card, don’t you?”

“Yeah, but… I… I’m… I mean… I’m late for the gala thing. And I don’t have time to wait for AAA…”

Silence on the other end…

I continue, “can YOU come after work and do the AAA thingy?”

There. I said it. I asked it.

Now I wait.

Hero? Not hero?

“You want leave your car there and pick it up after your party?”

“Well, I will have been drinking… you know…”

Which is true. I would be useless at that point.

I look for my ride. Not there yet. My party co-horts are still driving trying to find me. I have a little time… to wait… for my hero to emerge…

“No Problem.”

What? What am I hearing?

Is that my hero talking?

“After work, I’ll come and change your tire.”

“You will?”

He will?

He will!

Of course, he will!

“You’d do the same for me, right?”

I would?

I mean, “I would. I mean of course I would! Gosh-yeah. Extra keys are on the hook, okay?”

“Of course, baby! Now you go out and have fun at your party.”

Do I hear a Hero, talking or what?!

That’s a Hero, alright!

And, guess what? He’s MY Hero! And, dare I say it… It seems that he loves me!

Ooops! There are the girls, “I gotta go, honey. My friends are here. And, thank you! I love you!”

“I love you, too.”

Eureka!

As I stepped out of my 3/4-inflated car, and sashayed in all my doll-ness to the awaiting car of giggles and glee.

I looked back on my humbled car with confidence, knowing that my Hero was en-route.

Let me tell you – that is a super-fine feeling– to know that your Hero is on his way…

SOOOO…..Let it be known that I had a great time at the gala. Green Martinis and all…

And somewhere half way through the night, after he personally had changed my tire…

With his own two hands, no less… and a jack.

After he removed each lug nut, probably silently cursing my name…

And, dang that I missed that he was probably that scruffy-sexy-dirty… you know that kind of sexy-dirty… where he’s a man, doing manly things, getting manly dirty, and well dang, it manly-sexy hot!

Yeah, I missed all that…

Dang.

But, my phone buzzed as George was serving us decaf coffee and cream, my husband sent me a text, “Hope you’re having a great time. Car is back, the flat tire is changed.”

What a guy? What an amazing, wonderful guy.

And, the cursing part, well that’s okay, because he IS a man.

A freaking hot-sexy-manly man!

Man that uses his manly powers to have his way with me…

… … … ;-)

And, well, ladies, I have to tell you that It’s good to test your men from time to time, to find out if they are heroes or not.

Because every once in a while, and I don’t mean everyday, but every once in a while you might just need your very own Hero.

Girls… and it’s okay to be rescued every-so-often… (not TOO often)… and how wonderful that it be from the one man in the world that you love the most.

(Yay!)

BTW, he’s MY hero, Chicas.

Back off, bi-atches!

Now I’ve got to go smudge my lipstick to thank him…

Well… he IS a man…     ;-)

Xoxo

Belle

My Manly Man Hero... and Me!

My Manly Man Hero... and Me!

—–

Digital Edition only $0.99

Writer’s Digest Awarded “E.B. White and Me.” Get your copy today!

Available for ALL DIGITAL READERS!

Available at Amazon!

E.B. White and Me

E.B. White and Me

BUY IT TODAY!

xoxo

Belle

www.BelleKarper.com

FIRST PLACE WINNER – MOFILM Los Angeles, Next SXSW competition in Austin, then Barcelona, Spain!

Writer's Digest Award Winner - S. Belle Karper A 78th Annual Writer’s Digest Award Winning Author

Finalist 2011 Top 25 Semi-Finalist Los Angeles Comedy Festival

Finalist 2011 10th FilmMakers International Screenwriting Awards (1st Round Qualifier — Still in Running)

Finalist 2011 New York City Gotham Film Festival – Final 5th Place Comedy

Finalist and 1st Runner Up Screenwriting Comp

Top 24 Finalist Los Angeles Reel Film Festival 2011

Contest Top 20 Finalist Atlanta PeachTree Film Festival 2011

Top 24 Finalist SkyFest Film Festival 2011

— Announcing  “PICKLED TINK” — Screwball Comedy Screenplay!   Belle Karper,

— Announcing  “MAKING UP WITH MORTELLA” — Dark Comedy about Good and Evil, the magic of MakeUp and the Beauty of the Heart.

Award-Winning Author, Screenwriter, Speaker, Humor, Comedy, Suspense, Tragedy www.BelleKarper.com                         Email Belle@BelleKarper.com WHY THE WIDOW WEARS BLACK - An Edgy Memoir from an Outspoken Survivor Check out Belle Karper’s – Beauties and Beasts – Blog! Baby! Blog! and Belle Karper Face Book & the popular Twitter-Belle - The Ridiculous Escapades of Belle Karper on YouTube!

All on Website Save it, Baby! Count me in! Add to Technorati Favorites BelleKarper-AuthorSpeaker7.jpg picture by bellekarper

And, of course, watch my Skydiving Video.

IWOSC Holiday Dinner Gala at Los Angeles Biltmore

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Add to Technorati Favorites (Save it, Baby! Count me in!)

So, it goes like this . . .

Well, it time of year again!

The time for laughing loud, green martinis, and general mayhem!

So let’s get this party started!

Belle's on the way to the ball!

Belle's on the way to the ball!

Where's the freaking car? Let's get out of here!

Where's the freaking car? Let's get out of here!

West Valley contingent holding up the dang tree!

West Valley contingent holding up the dang tree!

Where's my martini?

Where's my martini?

Sitting on Santa Steven Sanchez's lap!

Sitting on Santa Steven Sanchez's lap!

Oh yeah!... naughty Santa!

Oh yeah!... naughty Santa!

Can you believe that I GOT A FLAT TIRE on the way there, and STILL HAD THIS MUCH FUN??!!

Digital Edition only $0.99

Writer’s Digest Awarded “E.B. White and Me.” Get your copy today!

Available for ALL DIGITAL READERS!

Available at Amazon!

E.B. White and Me

E.B. White and Me

BUY IT TODAY!

xoxo

Belle

www.BelleKarper.com

FIRST PLACE WINNER – MOFILM Los Angeles, Next SXSW competition in Austin, then Barcelona, Spain!

Writer's Digest Award Winner - S. Belle Karper A 78th Annual Writer’s Digest Award Winning Author

Finalist 2011 Top 25 Semi-Finalist Los Angeles Comedy Festival

Finalist 2011 10th FilmMakers International Screenwriting Awards (1st Round Qualifier — Still in Running)

Finalist 2011 New York City Gotham Film Festival – Final 5th Place Comedy

Finalist and 1st Runner Up Screenwriting Comp

Top 24 Finalist Los Angeles Reel Film Festival 2011

Contest Top 20 Finalist Atlanta PeachTree Film Festival 2011

Top 24 Finalist SkyFest Film Festival 2011

— Announcing  “PICKLED TINK” — Screwball Comedy Screenplay!   Belle Karper,

— Announcing  “MAKING UP WITH MORTELLA” — Dark Comedy about Good and Evil, the magic of MakeUp and the Beauty of the Heart.

Award-Winning Author, Screenwriter, Speaker, Humor, Comedy, Suspense, Tragedy www.BelleKarper.com                         Email Belle@BelleKarper.com WHY THE WIDOW WEARS BLACK - An Edgy Memoir from an Outspoken Survivor Check out Belle Karper’s – Beauties and Beasts – Blog! Baby! Blog! and Belle Karper Face Book & the popular Twitter-Belle - The Ridiculous Escapades of Belle Karper on YouTube!

All on Website Save it, Baby! Count me in! Add to Technorati Favorites BelleKarper-AuthorSpeaker7.jpg picture by bellekarper

And, of course, watch my Skydiving Video.

“E. B. White and Me” Now Available for ALL Digital Formats!

Bookmark and Share

Add to Technorati Favorites (Save it, Baby! Count me in!)

So, it goes like this . . .

Digital Edition only $0.99

Writer’s Digest Awarded “E.B. White and Me.” Get your copy today!

Available for ALL DIGITAL READERS!

Available at Amazon!

E.B. White and Me

E.B. White and Me

BUY IT TODAY!

xoxo

Belle

www.BelleKarper.com

FIRST PLACE WINNER – MOFILM Los Angeles, Next SXSW competition in Austin, then Barcelona, Spain!

Writer's Digest Award Winner - S. Belle Karper A 78th Annual Writer’s Digest Award Winning Author

Finalist 2011 Top 25 Semi-Finalist Los Angeles Comedy Festival

Finalist 2011 10th FilmMakers International Screenwriting Awards (1st Round Qualifier — Still in Running)

Finalist 2011 New York City Gotham Film Festival – Final 5th Place Comedy

Finalist and 1st Runner Up Screenwriting Comp

Top 24 Finalist Los Angeles Reel Film Festival 2011

Contest Top 20 Finalist Atlanta PeachTree Film Festival 2011

Top 24 Finalist SkyFest Film Festival 2011

— Announcing  “PICKLED TINK” — Screwball Comedy Screenplay!   Belle Karper,

— Announcing  “MAKING UP WITH MORTELLA” — Dark Comedy about Good and Evil, the magic of MakeUp and the Beauty of the Heart.

Award-Winning Author, Screenwriter, Speaker, Humor, Comedy, Suspense, Tragedy www.BelleKarper.com                         Email Belle@BelleKarper.com WHY THE WIDOW WEARS BLACK - An Edgy Memoir from an Outspoken Survivor Check out Belle Karper’s – Beauties and Beasts – Blog! Baby! Blog! and Belle Karper Face Book & the popular Twitter-Belle - The Ridiculous Escapades of Belle Karper on YouTube!

All on Website Save it, Baby! Count me in! Add to Technorati Favorites BelleKarper-AuthorSpeaker7.jpg picture by bellekarper

And, of course, watch my Skydiving Video.

Taco Bell again?…!

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Add to Technorati Favorites (Save it, Baby! Count me in!)

So, it goes like this . . .

Taco Bell again?…My son’s definitely a connoisseur of fine dining. Three tacos and a crunchwrap, please.

UGH Please!

xoxo

Belle

Save it, Baby! Count me in! Add to Technorati Favorites
BelleKarper-AuthorSpeaker7.jpg picture by bellekarper

And, of course, watch my Skydiving Video.

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